i broke down.

i broke down while driving back to church. i didn't know how to react anymore. the only way that came to me was to cry my heart out. i haven't cried like this for a long long long long time. i had to stop on the highway shoulder and cry. that was my only way of letting go. how many more times must i go through? how many! i want to let you go but i can't. i don't know how to. i don't want to. please let it come from you.